Join Date: May 2002
Sportbike: looking to get dirty!
Years Riding: long time
How you found us: SBN
A dogs letter to God
A Dog's Letter to God
> >Dear God: Why do humans smell the flowers, but seldom, if ever, smell
> >Dear God: When we get to heaven, can we sit on your couch? Or is it
> >going to
> >be the same old story?
> >Dear God: Why are there cars named after the jaguar, the cougar, the
> >the colt, the stingray, and the rabbit, but not ONE named for a dog?
> >How often do you see a cougar riding around? We dogs love a nice
> >it be so hard to rename the 'Chrysler Eagle' the 'Chrysler Beagle'?
> >Dear God: If a dog barks his head off in the forest and no human hears
> >is he still a bad dog?
> >Dear God: We dogs can understand human verbal instructions, hand
> >whistles, horns, clickers, beepers, scent ID's, electromagnetic energy
> >and Frisbee flight paths. What do humans understand?
> >Dear God: More meatballs, less spaghetti, please.
> >Dear God: When we get to the Pearly Gates, do we have to shake hands
> >Dear God: Are there mailmen in Heaven? If there are, will I have to
> >Dear God: Let me give you a list of just some of the things I must
> > to be a good dog:
> >1. I will not eat the cats' food before they eat it or after they
> >2. I will not roll on dead seagulls, fish, crabs, etc., just because
> >the way they smell.
> >3. I will not munch on "leftovers" in the kitty litter box; although
> > they are tasty, they are not food.
> >4. The diaper pail is not a cookie jar.
> >5. The sofa is not a face towel; neither are Mom and Dad's laps.
> >6. The garbage collector is not stealing our stuff.
> >7. My head does not belong in the refrigerator.
> >8. I will not bite the officer's hand when he reaches in for Mom's
> > driver's license and registration.
> >9. I will not play tug-of-war with Dad's underwear when he's on
> >10. Sticking my nose into someone's crotch is not an acceptable way of
> >11. I do not need to suddenly stand straight up when I'm lying under
> >coffee table.
> >12. I must shake the rainwater out of my fur before entering the
> >13. I will not throw up in the car.
> >14. I will not come in from outside and immediately drag my butt
> >15. I will! not sit in the middle of the living room and lick my
> >company is over.
> >16. The cat is not a squeaky toy; so when I play with him and he makes
> >noise, it's usually not a good thing.
> >And, finally my last question;
> >Dear God, when I get to Heaven May I have my testicles back?
Brian (F.K.A. Crazy)
“You can’t escape the responsibility of tomorrow by evading it today.”
“Blessed are the young, for they shall inherit the national debt.”