Socially Unacceptable Humor - Chicagoland Sportbikes
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post #1 of 9 (permalink) Old 10-04-2011, 06:54 AM Thread Starter
Sarcasm in every post.
 
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Join Date: Jun 2004
Location: 40mi West of the City
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Location: 40mi West of the City
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Socially Unacceptable Humor

A few of these were new to me.



I was in bed with a blind girl last night and she said that I had the biggest penis she had ever laid her hands on. I said "You're pulling my leg."

I saw a poor old lady fall over today on the ice!! At least I presume she was poor - she only had $1.20 in her purse.

My girlfriend thinks that I'm a stalker. Well, she's not exactly my girlfriend yet.

Went for my routine checkup today and everything seemed to be going fine until he stuck his index finger up my butt! Do you think I should change dentists?

A wife says to her husband you're always pushing me around and talkingbehind my back. He says what do you expect? You're in a wheel chair.

I was explaining to my wife last night that when you die you get reincarnated but must come back as a different creature. She said she would like to come back as a cow. I said, "You're obviously not listening".

The wife has been missing a week now. Police said to prepare for the worst. So, I have been to the thrift shop to get all of her clothes back.

At the Senior Citizens Center they had a contest the other day. I lost by one point: The question was: Where do women mostly have curly hair? Apparently the correct answer was Africa!!!

One of the other questions that I missed was to name one thing commonly found in cells. It appears that Mexicans is not the correct answer either.

There's a new Muslim clothing shop opened in our shopping center, but I've been banned from it after asking to look at some of the new bomber jackets.

You can say lots of bad things about pedophiles but at least they drive slowly past schools.

A buddy of mine has just told me he's getting it on with his girlfriend and her twin. I said "How can you tell them apart?" He
said "Her brother's got a mustache."

Just put a deposit down on a brand new Porsche and mentioned it on Facebook. I said, "I can't wait for the new 911 to arrive!" Next thing I know 4,000 Muslims have added me as a friend!!

Being a modest man, when I checked into my hotel on a recent trip, I said to the lady at the registration desk, "I hope the porn channel in my room is disabled." To which she replied, "No, it's regular people-porn, you sick pervert.

The Red Cross have just knocked at our door and asked if we could help towards the floods in Pakistan. I said we would love to, but our garden hose only reaches the driveway.

Ken.


My Garage.

It may be that your sole purpose in life is simply to serve as a warning to others.
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post #2 of 9 (permalink) Old 10-04-2011, 07:04 AM
he who is absent foreskin
 
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Nice



Sent from my SPH-D710 using Tapatalk

Jordan
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post #3 of 9 (permalink) Old 10-04-2011, 07:12 AM
n00b
 
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Hahaha those are great
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post #4 of 9 (permalink) Old 10-04-2011, 07:57 AM
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hahahha
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post #5 of 9 (permalink) Old 10-04-2011, 10:10 PM
PIKUACH NEFESH
 
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Those are good.
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post #6 of 9 (permalink) Old 10-05-2011, 06:12 AM
I am the Stig.
 
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Location: Chicago
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Sportbike: 09' Triumph Daytona 675, 06' Triumph Thruxton, 74' CB360
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post #7 of 9 (permalink) Old 10-05-2011, 08:05 AM
The Halo hides my Horns
 
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Wow there are a couple good ones in there.

aut cum scuto aut in scuto

http://www.firespeedtactical.com

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post #8 of 9 (permalink) Old 10-05-2011, 09:39 AM
CLSB's Florida Chapter.
 
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awesome.

-Mopar

1997 Dodge Viper GTS
2013 Dodge Dart Rallye
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post #9 of 9 (permalink) Old 10-05-2011, 09:49 AM

 
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Join Date: Jun 2004
Location: Oswego, IL.
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Thanks for the humor......

CCS race official
sold the track bike
too slow to ride

"Repairs end December 31. 2011."

OK, it was a tough day.....back open again!!!
Bring me your broken down machines.

Butch @ 630-777-0273

Ytrap #819, forever in my prayers.
Arch, this Bud is for you..
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