Things you'd love to say out loud at work - Chicagoland Sportbikes
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post #1 of 8 (permalink) Old 06-02-2004, 01:09 PM Thread Starter
stuck in 6th gear
 
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Join Date: Apr 2002
Location: Palatine
Posts: 7,632
Location: Palatine
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Years Riding: not enough lately *(&%# work...
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Things you'd love to say out loud at work



1. I can see your point, but I still think you're full of shit.
2. I don't know what your problem is, but I'll bet it's hard to pronounce.
3. How bout never? Is never good for you?
4. I see you've set aside this special time to humiliate yourself in public.
5. I'm really easy to get along with once you people learn to see it my way.
6. I'll try being nicer if you'll try being smarter.
7. I'm out of my mind, but feel free to leave a message.
8. I don't work here. I'm a consultant.
9. It sounds like English, but I can't understand a damn word you're saying.
10. Ahhh...I see the screw-up fairy has visited us again.....
11. I like you. You remind me of myself when I was young and stupid.
12. You are validating my inherent mistrust of strangers.
13. I have plenty of talent and vision; I just don't give a damn.
14. I'm already visualizing the duct tape over your mouth.
15. I will always cherish the initial misconceptions I had about you.
16. Thank you. We're all refreshed and challenged by your unique point of view.
17. The fact that no one understands you doesn't mean you're an artist.
18. Any connection between your reality and mine is purely coincidental.
19. What am I? Flypaper for freaks?
20. I'm not being rude. You're just insignificant.
21. It's a thankless job, but I've got Karma to burn off.
22. Yes, I am an agent of Satan, but my duties are largely ceremonial.
23. And your crybaby whiny-assed opinion would be....?
24. Do I look like a people person?
25. This isn't an office. It's Hell with fluorescent lighting.
26. Sarcasm is just one more service we offer.
27. If I throw a stick, will you leave?
28. I started out with nothing & still have most of it left.
29. Errors have been made. Others will be blamed.
30. Whatever kind of look you were going for, you missed.
31. I'm trying to imagine you with a personality.
32. A cubicle is just a padded cell without a door.
33. Can I trade this job for what's behind door #1?
34. Too many freaks, not enough circuses.
35. Nice perfume. Must you marinate in it?
36. Chaos, panic & disorder - my work is done here.
37. How do I set a laser printer to stun?
38. I thought I wanted a career; turns out I just wanted a salary.
39. Who lit the fuse on your tampon?
40. Oh I get it....like humor...but different.
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post #2 of 8 (permalink) Old 06-02-2004, 01:25 PM
CLSB's Florida Chapter.
 
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Join Date: Apr 2004
Location: Apopka, Florida
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i have seen those before.. i have them printed out on my desk here at work and i try and use at least one per day.

-Mopar

1997 Dodge Viper GTS
2013 Dodge Dart Rallye
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post #3 of 8 (permalink) Old 06-02-2004, 06:36 PM
Kansas Baby
 
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Location: BTK Land
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Quote:
Originally posted by MoparBoyy
i have seen those before.. i have them printed out on my desk here at work and i try and use at least one per day.


"It's all about the pain, the jewelry and the ink are just souvenirs"


<--Michelle
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post #4 of 8 (permalink) Old 06-02-2004, 06:54 PM
SICK OF IT ALL
 
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Location: Dallas, TX
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Years Riding: 9+
How you found us: drove by Strats one night & stopped in
           
Re: Things you'd love to say out loud at work

Quote:
Originally posted by Ernie
This isn't an office. It's Hell with fluorescent lighting.


Wayne


Standing together
Side by side
Staying true to what’s inside
United as one, we fight

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post #5 of 8 (permalink) Old 06-05-2004, 09:54 PM
Joe Momma...
 
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I like 3 and 6, can you tell I answer a computer help line?

My name is JB, people call me JB

Quote:
Originally Posted by flinchy
"I wouldn't be surprised to see this guy catch a pass with his ass cheeks"
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post #6 of 8 (permalink) Old 06-05-2004, 10:16 PM
Resident Cager
 
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Join Date: May 2004
Location: Hoffman Estates
Posts: 119
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Years Riding: 5 years off and on as a 2up passenger
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We have one we have at the dealership (we have a long list) but the favorite is "You don't know it yet, but you were just leaving"

"Smile, it makes people
wonder what you've
been up to"
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post #7 of 8 (permalink) Old 06-05-2004, 10:17 PM
M109R
 
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Join Date: May 2002
Location: Melrose Park
Posts: 562
Location: Melrose Park
Sportbike: 07 Suzuki Boulevard M109R
Years Riding: 6
How you found us: ??
  
Your missing
1) I'm not prejudiced I hate everyone the same!
2) The more you flap your mouth the more aggravated i get!

How do you turn this thing on?
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post #8 of 8 (permalink) Old 06-05-2004, 11:04 PM
Please attend carefully..
 
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Join Date: Apr 2002
Location: Chicago (NW side) 60707
Posts: 2,625
Location: Chicago (NW side) 60707
Sportbike: 2000 ZX6R (the green one!)
Years Riding: 2000
How you found us: I've been here a while...
           
Re: Things you'd love to say out loud at work

Quote:
Originally posted by Ernie

27. If I throw a stick, will you leave?

37. How do I set a laser printer to stun?


And one time, when a form wasn't ready to automatucally be inserted into a policy packet, I had the opportunity to tell a user that to get the form in the packet, she should "stuff it".

"Stupidity is also a gift of God, but one mustn't misuse it." - JP2

"Life is just a place where we spend time between games" - former Philadelphia Flyers coach Fred Shero

"everyone's a nutjob, some just have more restraint than others" - EndlessRR
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