Why I Fired My Secretary... - Chicagoland Sportbikes
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post #1 of 5 (permalink) Old 10-13-2005, 08:58 PM Thread Starter
R.I.P D.G.
 
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Why I Fired My Secretary...

hope its not a repost...

Last week was my birthday and i didn't feel very well waking up that
morning. I went downstairs for breakfast hoping my wife would be
pleasant and say, "happy birthday!", and possibly have a present for
me. As it turned out, she barely said good morning, let alone "happy
birthday."

i thought... Well, that's marriage for you, but the kids will
remember. My kids came into breakfast and didn't say a word. So when
i left for the office, i was feeling pretty low and somewhat
despondent.

As i walked into my office, my secretary jane said, "good morning,
boss, happy birthday!" it felt a little better that at least someone
had remembered. I worked until one o'clockand then jane knocked on
my door and said, "you know, it's such a beautiful day outside, and
it's your birthday, let's go out to lunch, just you and me."
i said, "thanks jane, that's the greatest thing i've heard all day.
Let's go!" we went to lunch. But we didn't go where we normally would
go. We dined instead at a little place with a private table. We had
two martinis each and i enjoyed the meal tremendously

on the way back to the office, jane said, "you know, it's such a
beautiful day... We don't need to go back to the office, do we?"
i responded, "i guess not. What do you have in mind?"
she said, "let's go to my apartment."

after arriving at her apartment jane turned to me and said, "boss,
if you don't mind, i'm going to step into the bedroom for a moment.
I'll be right back."

"ok." i nervously replied.

She went into the bedroom and, after a couple of minutes, she came
out carrying a huge birthday cake... Followed by my wife, kids, and
dozens of my friends and co-workers, all singing "happy birthday".

And i just sat there...

On the couch...

Naked.

What would you attempt to do if you knew you could not fail?

Preserve me from the enemy who has something to gain, and from the friend who has something to lose.

There is one who remembers the way to your door: Life you may evade, but Death you shall not.
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post #2 of 5 (permalink) Old 10-13-2005, 09:05 PM
well i got my knee down BUT, i need a new side panel
 
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Far out
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post #3 of 5 (permalink) Old 10-13-2005, 09:07 PM
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an oldie but goodie...would be juuuust a little funnier in the *Funny Papers* forum

daayyum I cant imagine

Mike

When the tailgate drops..the bullshit stops
Hunt ethically - Hunt with a trained Retriever !
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post #4 of 5 (permalink) Old 10-14-2005, 05:29 PM
Asphalt tastes bad, kids.
 
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OH THAT'S TERRIBLE!

<----Jeff
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post #5 of 5 (permalink) Old 10-15-2005, 02:22 PM
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hahahaha ahhh geeeezzz
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