Men & Women - Chicagoland Sportbikes
Chicagoland Sportbikes
 
The Funny Papers got some funny stuff? Make us laugh.

 
LinkBack Thread Tools Display Modes
post #1 of 14 (permalink) Old 10-14-2005, 02:13 PM Thread Starter
I'm always learning......
 
SloRoll's Avatar
 
Join Date: Dec 2002
Location: Southwest Suburbs
Posts: 5,778
Location: Southwest Suburbs
Sportbike: 2k14 FLHXS, 1981 FXE, 1949 HD EL Panhead, Yami PW80
Years Riding: Long, long, long, long, long time.
How you found us: GPS
           
Men & Women

this is a must read.

I never quite figured out why the sexual urge of men and women differ so
much. And I never have figured out the whole Venus and Mars thing. I have
never figured out why men think with their head and women with their heart.
FOR EXAMPLE: One evening last week, my girlfriend and I were getting into bed.
Well, the passion starts to heat up, and she eventually says "I don't feel like it, I just want you to hold me."
I said "WHAT??!! What was that?!"
So she says the words that every boyfriend on the planet dreads to hear...
"You're just not in touch with my emotional needs as a woman enough for me
to satisfy your physical needs as a man." She responded to my puzzled look
by saying, "Can't you just love me for who I am and not what I do for you in
the bedroom?"
Realizing that nothing was going to happen that night, I went to sleep.
The very next day I opted to take the day off of work to spend time with
her. We went out to a nice lunch and then went shopping at a big, big
unnamed department store. I walked around with her while she tried on
several different very expensive outfits. She couldn't decide which one to
take so I told her we'd just buy them all. She wanted new shoes to
compliment her new clothes, so I said lets get a pair for each outfit. We
went onto the jewelry department where she picked out a pair of diamond
earrings. Let me tell you...she was so excited. She must have thought I was
one wave short of a shipwreck. I started to think she was testing me because
she asked for a tennis bracelet when she doesn't even know how to play
tennis. I think I threw her for a loop when I said, "That's fine, honey."
She was almost nearing sexual satisfaction from all of the excitement.
Smiling with excited anticipation she finally said, "I think this is all
dear, let's go to the cashier."
I could hardly contain myself when I blurted out, "No honey, I don't feel like it."
Her face just went completely blank as her jaw dropped with a baffled WHAT?"
I then said "honey! I just want you to HOLD this stuff for a while. You're
just not in touch with my financial needs as a man enough for me to satisfy
your shopping needs as a woman." And just when she had this look like she
was going to kill me, I added, "Why can't you just love me for who I am and
not for the things I buy you?"
Apparently I'm not having sex tonight either

Synthetic Lifelike Organism Responsible for Observation and Logical Learning - SLOROLL

Remember there's a big difference between kneeling down and bending over. Zappa 1974

And I said....."Look here brother, who you jiving with that cosmik debris? Now is that a real poncho or is that a Sears poncho? Zappa 1974
SloRoll is offline  
Sponsored Links
Advertisement
 
post #2 of 14 (permalink) Old 10-14-2005, 02:17 PM
Instigator
 
bigbaddiesel's Avatar
 
Join Date: Oct 2005
Location: Chicago, Illinois
Posts: 283
Location: Chicago, Illinois
Sportbike: 2003 Yamaha R6
Years Riding: 8
How you found us: Google!
  
Oh my god, you are in sooooo much trouble for that.... Kudos though, one run for the home team

If i ever even considered pulling something like that, i would have awoken at night with a knife on the old pride, im pretty sure. Then again, thats why im single now, and not planning on getting myself in a relationship any time soon anyways

Jake
bigbaddiesel is offline  
post #3 of 14 (permalink) Old 10-14-2005, 02:17 PM
Moderator
 
Chills's Avatar
 
Join Date: Aug 2003
Location: Naperville, IL
Posts: 23,640
Location: Naperville, IL
Sportbike: Kawi ZX-10R
Years Riding: Since February 2012
How you found us: NESBA bbs
           
Send a message via Yahoo to Chills

Never a bad time to climb... unless the weather is really horrible, and then you climb inside!

I bleed GREEN
Chills is offline  
post #4 of 14 (permalink) Old 10-14-2005, 02:19 PM
It's on the left.
 
uniball's Avatar
 
Join Date: May 2005
Location: Naperville, IL
Posts: 2,740
Location: Naperville, IL
Sportbike: '04 FZ6 faster blue
Years Riding: I'm still teething.
How you found us: carved in a table at Carl's in Mannheim
           
Send a message via AIM to uniball

LIVESTRONG

I survived another year.

My Flickr Pictures
uniball is offline  
post #5 of 14 (permalink) Old 10-14-2005, 02:46 PM
Joe
Registered User
 
Joe's Avatar
 
Join Date: Dec 2004
Location: Plainfield
Posts: 2,841
Location: Plainfield
Sportbike: 2007 GSX-R600, 2007 KX250F, 2004 YZ450F, 2006 CRF50
Years Riding: As long as I been ridin your mama
How you found us: Joemama
           
Send a message via MSN to Joe Send a message via Yahoo to Joe
Joe is offline  
post #6 of 14 (permalink) Old 10-14-2005, 02:55 PM
Enjoying Life!!
 
CHeYeNNe's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jan 2004
Location: Cruising Around Enjoying Life!!
Posts: 17,774
Location: Cruising Around Enjoying Life!!
Sportbike: 09 Night Rod Black Denim
Years Riding: Not Long Enuff!!!!
How you found us: Friends
           


I'm sick of following my dreams. I'm just going to ask them where they're goin', and hook up with them later!!
CHeYeNNe is offline  
post #7 of 14 (permalink) Old 10-14-2005, 03:07 PM
VTwin FTW!
 
ChicagoFactory's Avatar
 
Join Date: Nov 2002
Location: Elk Grove Village
Posts: 5,565
Location: Elk Grove Village
Sportbike: 2013 Ducati Diavel Cromo
Years Riding: 20
How you found us: Friend
           

Mike

"Life is all about ass ... either you are covering it, kicking it, kissing it, sitting on it or trying to get it."
ChicagoFactory is offline  
post #8 of 14 (permalink) Old 10-14-2005, 03:34 PM
Fear is the mind killer
 
ChiefBD's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jul 2005
Location: Waukegan,IL
Posts: 8,772
Location: Waukegan,IL
Sportbike: 05 GSXR 600, 03 RM 250
Years Riding: Thousands of miles, multiple engines
How you found us: www.gsxr.com
           


It is such a double standard, but they never see it that way.

Xbox Live GOW Killer
Handle : ChiefBDR

Quote:
Originally Posted by Kegger View Post
"Ride it like you have 30 monthly remaining payments" should keep most people out of trouble.
ChiefBD is offline  
post #9 of 14 (permalink) Old 10-14-2005, 03:40 PM
Let the good times roll
 
Hotwheels's Avatar
 
Join Date: May 2003
Location: west 'burbs
Posts: 757
Location: west 'burbs
Sportbike: 2005 HD Road King
Years Riding: 30+ years
How you found us: From another web forum
 

Shiny side up, rubber side down.
Hotwheels is offline  
post #10 of 14 (permalink) Old 10-14-2005, 05:37 PM
Asphalt tastes bad, kids.
 
Honda4Ever's Avatar
 
Join Date: Oct 2003
Location: New Mexico
Posts: 1,544
Location: New Mexico
Sportbike: Boo-Boo('02 Black/Yellow F4i)
Years Riding: 3
How you found us: My brother is on here.
    
Send a message via Yahoo to Honda4Ever
I am not worthy. You have more guts than me.

<----Jeff
Honda4Ever is offline  
post #11 of 14 (permalink) Old 10-14-2005, 06:11 PM
CLSB Pimpologist
 
HEESH's Avatar
 
Join Date: Sep 2004
Location: Palatine, IL
Posts: 2,183
Location: Palatine, IL
Sportbike: K5 Gixxer 750
Years Riding: 9 years but not that many miles....
How you found us: Friend
           
Send a message via AIM to HEESH
that is awesome!!!

------------------------------------------------
-Heesh

I can't wait for the summer...
HEESH is offline  
post #12 of 14 (permalink) Old 10-14-2005, 06:36 PM
SICK OF IT ALL
 
Ocean's Avatar
 
Join Date: Aug 2003
Location: Dallas, TX
Posts: 4,471
Location: Dallas, TX
Sportbike: missing my RC51
Years Riding: 9+
How you found us: drove by Strats one night & stopped in
           

Wayne


Standing together
Side by side
Staying true to what’s inside
United as one, we fight

Ocean is offline  
post #13 of 14 (permalink) Old 10-14-2005, 06:49 PM
Pathological Thrill Seekr
 
Deuces's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jul 2004
Location: Pedaling my ass off!
Posts: 5,196
Location: Pedaling my ass off!
Sportbike: Trek Marlin
Years Riding: Noob
How you found us: Followed the fast guys
           
Send a message via AIM to Deuces

Ride smart... stupid hurts.

Everyone crashes. Some get back on. Some don't. Some can't...

Godspeed 788!!! We miss you!
Deuces is offline  
post #14 of 14 (permalink) Old 10-15-2005, 10:19 AM
Listen to Motley Crue
 
norton's Avatar
 
Join Date: Apr 2005
Location: Illinois 60050
Posts: 2,339
Location: Illinois 60050
Sportbike: POSER
Years Riding: 3 Years
How you found us: Shadrach
           
norton is offline  
Reply

Quick Reply
Message:
Options

Register Now



In order to be able to post messages on the Chicagoland Sportbikes forums, you must first register.
Please enter your desired user name, your email address and other required details in the form below.

User Name:
Password
Please enter a password for your user account. Note that passwords are case-sensitive.

Password:


Confirm Password:
Email Address
Please enter a valid email address for yourself.

Email Address:
OR

Log-in










Thread Tools
Show Printable Version Show Printable Version
Email this Page Email this Page
Display Modes
Linear Mode Linear Mode



Posting Rules  
You may post new threads
You may post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is On
Trackbacks are On
Pingbacks are On
Refbacks are On

 
For the best viewing experience please update your browser to Google Chrome