Are you a Democrat, Republican or Southern - Chicagoland Sportbikes
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post #1 of 3 (permalink) Old 11-28-2005, 01:18 PM Thread Starter
The Victim Newbie
 
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Join Date: May 2004
Location: Westchester, IL
Posts: 7,384
Location: Westchester, IL
Sportbike: 2007 mountain bike
Years Riding: just started
How you found us: svrider.com
           
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Are you a Democrat, Republican or Southern

Are you a Democrat, Republican or Southern
Republican? Here is a little test that will help
you decide. The answer can be found by posing the
following question:

You're walking down a deserted street with your
wife and two small children. Suddenly, an Islamic
Terrorist with a huge knife comes around the corner,
locks eyes with you, screams obscenities, praises
Allah, raises the knife and charges at you. You are
carrying a Glock cal .40, and you are an expert
shot. You have mere seconds before he reaches you
and your family.



What do you do?

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Democrat's Answer:

Well, that's not enough information to answer the
question!

Does the man look poor, or oppressed?

Have I ever done anything to him that would
inspire him to attack?

Could we run away?

What does my wife think?

What about the kids?

Could I possibly swing the gun like a club and
knock the knife out of his hand?

What does the law say about this situation?

Does the Glock have appropriate safety built into
it?

Why am I carrying a loaded gun anyway, and what
kind of message does this send to society and to my
children?

Is it possible he'd be happy with just killing me?

Does he definitely want to kill me, or would he be
content just to wound me?

If I were to grab his knees and hold on, could my
family get away while he was stabbing me?

Should I call 9-1-1?

Why is this street so deserted?

We need to raise taxes, have a paint and weed day
and make this a happier, healthier street that would
discourage such behavior.

This is all so confusing! I need to debate this
with some friends for few days and try to come to a
consensus.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Republican's Answer:

BANG!

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~


Southern Republican's Answer:

BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG!
BANG! click.....

(sounds of reloading)

BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG!
BANG! click

Daughter: "Nice grouping, Daddy! Were those the
Winchester Silver Tips or Hollow Points?

Son: Git-r-Dun Pop! Can I shoot the next one?

Wife: You ain't taking that to the Taxidermist!

<-- Chris

turn the bars left and go right; that just isn't right
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post #2 of 3 (permalink) Old 11-28-2005, 01:21 PM
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Join Date: Apr 2002
Location: Plainfield IL
Posts: 45,956
Location: Plainfield IL
Sportbike: A couple of pasta rockets
Years Riding: Since 1989
How you found us: In the beginning there was CLSB and Tony saw that it was good.
           
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oldie but a goodie




HDTony.... Damn glad to meet you!

Government's view of the economy could be summed up in a few short phrases: If it moves, tax it. If it keeps moving, regulate it. And if it stops moving, subsidize it.

- Ronald Reagan

AirTek Heating & Air inc.
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post #3 of 3 (permalink) Old 11-28-2005, 01:26 PM
Old Squid on a Blade
 
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Join Date: Apr 2002
Location: Carpentersville
Posts: 9,389
Location: Carpentersville
Sportbike: 2000 929
Years Riding: Longer than most of you have been alive. And I'm still slow.
How you found us: The voices in my head told me to come here
           
Well I got the first part of the "Good ol Boy" answer right. My wife even knows the proper response to that.

There is nothing firm, nothing balanced, nothing durable in all the universe. Nothing remains in its original state, each day, each hour, each moment, there is change. Change is the essence of life. Embrace change as you do life. To fight change is to live in the past.
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