it seems that motorcycles are better than us.. (girls that is.) - Chicagoland Sportbikes
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post #1 of 3 (permalink) Old 08-02-2006, 05:49 PM Thread Starter
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it seems that motorcycles are better than us.. (girls that is.)

Your motorcycle doesn't get upset when you forget it's birthday.

You don't have to talk to your motorcycle after you ride it.



You can choke your motorcycle.



Your motorcycle doesn't get mad when you ignore it for a month or so.



Motorcycles don't get jealous if you come home with grease under your fingernails.



Motorcycles don't snore.



Your motorcycle won't wake you up at 3:00 AM and ask you if you love it.



Your motorcycle won't leave you for another rider.



You don't have to pay child support / alimony to an ex-motorcycle.



If you say bad things to your Motorcycles, you don't have to apologize before you can ride it again.



If your Motorcycle doesn't look good, you can paint it or get better parts.



If your Motorcycle goes flat, you can fix it.



If your Motorcycle is misaligned, you don't have to discuss politics to correct it.



If your Motorcycle is too loose, you can tighten it.



If your Motorcycle is too soft, you can get different shocks.



If your Motorcycle makes too much noise, you can buy a muffler.



If your Motorcycle smokes, you can do something about it.



It's always OK to use tie downs on your Motorcycle.



Motorcycles always feel like going for a ride.



Motorcycles don't care about how many other Motorcycles you have ridden.



Motorcycles don't care about how many other Motorcycles you have.



Motorcycles don't care if you are late.



Motorcycles don't get pregnant.



Motorcycles don't have parents.



Motorcycles don't insult you if you are a bad rider.



Motorcycles don't mind if you look at other Motorcycles, or if you buy Motorcycle magazines.



Motorcycles don't whine unless something is really wrong.



Motorcycles last longer.



Motorcycles only need their fluids changed every 2,000 miles.



Motorcycles' curves never sag.



New Motorcycles must be asked for, and if you don't want to pay for them, you don't get them.



When riding, you and your Motorcycle both arrive at the same time.



You can have a beer while riding your Motorcycle.



You can kick your Motorcycle to wake it up.



You can ride a Motorcycle as long as you want and it won't get sore.



You can ride a Motorcycle any time of the month.



You can share your Motorcycle with your friends.



You can't get diseases from a Motorcycle you don't know very well.



You don't have to be jealous of the guy that works on your Motorcycle.



You don't have to convince your Motorcycle that you're a motorcyclist and that you think that Motorcycles are
equals.



You don't have to deal with priests or blood-tests to register your Motorcycle.





You don't have to take a shower before riding your Motorcycle.



You only need to get a new chain or belt for your Motorcycle when the old one is REALLY worn.



Your Motorcycle never wants a night out alone with the other Motorcycles.



Your parents don't remain in touch with your old Motorcycle after you dump it.



Your Motorcycle doesn't care what you're wearing when you take it out.



You love buying RUBBER for your bike when you want to go on a long and hard ride.



One gets in no trouble for storing disassembled pieces of the motorcycle in the basement.



Disassembling the motorcycle is done out of pleasure rather than need.



Motorcycles always sound pleasant.



The rashes you get from motorcycles go away without those painful IM Penicillin shots.



The inventor of the Harley Davidson Motorcycle, Arthur Davidson, died and went to heaven. At the gates, St. Peter told Arthur, "Since you've been such a good man and your motorcycles have changed the world, your reward is, you can hang out with anyone you want in Heaven."

Arthur thought about it for a minute and then said, "I want to hang out with God."

St. Peter took Arthur to the Throne Room, and introduced him to God.

God recognized Arthur and commented, "Okay, so you were the one who invented motorcycles, eh?!"

Arthur said, "Ya, that was me..."

God commented, "Well, what's the big deal of inventing something that's pretty unstable, makes noise and pollution, and can't run without a road?"

Arthur was apparently embarrassed, but finally spoke, "Excuse me but aren't you the inventor of woman???"

God said, "Ah, yes."

"Well," said Arthur, "professional to professional, you have some major design flaws in your invention":

There's too much inconsistency in the front-end protrusion.
It chatters constantly at high speeds.
Most of the rear ends are too soft and wobble too much.
The intake is placed way too close to the exhaust.
And the maintenance costs are outrageous!!"

"Hmmmm, you may have some good points there," replied God, "hold on."

God went to his Celestial supercomputer, typed in a few words and waited for the results.

The computer printed out a slip of paper and God read it. "Well, it may be true that my invention is flawed," God said to Arthur, "but ...according to these numbers, more men are riding my invention than yours!"

If you are flammable and have legs... you are NEVER blocking a fire exit. - Mitch Hedberg

there is a time and a place for speed... and it is not on the highway with heavy traffic

when the boogeyman goes to sleep at night, he checks his closet for chuck norris.

Chris: Why do you put your hand on your hip when you ride?
Me: Where else would i put it?
Chris: ON THE HANDLEBAR?!
Me: nah
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post #2 of 3 (permalink) Old 08-02-2006, 05:50 PM
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If only motorcycles had boobs..... *sigh*

Never a bad time to climb... unless the weather is really horrible, and then you climb inside!

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post #3 of 3 (permalink) Old 08-03-2006, 09:33 AM
I'd rather be railing :)
 
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Chills
If only motorcycles had boobs..... *sigh*
Kaos' BMW K1200S has a real shapely rear end....

J A Y riding around the world on a 98 Suzuki DR650SE (sanDRina)
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