The Harley And The Dirty Dishes - Chicagoland Sportbikes
Chicagoland Sportbikes
The Funny Papers got some funny stuff? Make us laugh.

LinkBack Thread Tools Display Modes
post #1 of 8 (permalink) Old 09-15-2006, 08:42 AM Thread Starter
Semper Fidellis
Devil Dog's Avatar
Join Date: Dec 2005
Location: Elgin, IL
Posts: 1,619
Location: Elgin, IL
Sportbike: NADA
Years Riding: Since 1984
How you found us: Google
Send a message via Yahoo to Devil Dog
The Harley And The Dirty Dishes

Mick wanted to buy a Harley. He doesn't have much luck, until one
day he comes across a Harley with a 'For Sale' sign on it. The bike
seems even better than a new one, although it is 10 years old.

It is shiny and in absolute mint condition. He immediately buys it,
and asks the seller how he kept it in such great condition for 10 years.
"Well, it's quite simple, really," says the seller, "whenever the bike
is outside and it's going to rain, rub Vaseline on the chrome.

It protects it from the rain." And he hands Mick a jar of Vaseline.
That night, his girlfriend, Michelle, invites him over to meet her
parents. Naturally, they take the bike there.

But just before they enter the house, Michelle stops him and says, "I
have to tell you something about my family before we go in." "When we
eat dinner, we don't talk. In fact, the first person who says anything
during dinner has to do the dishes."

"No problem," he says. And in they go.

Mick is shocked. Right smack
in the middle of the living room is a huge stack of dirty dishes.
In the kitchen is another huge stack of dishes. Piled up on the stairs,
in the corridor, everywhere he looks, dirty dishes. They sit down to
dinner and, sure enough, no one says a word.

As dinner progresses, Mick decides to take advantage of the situation.
So he leans over and kisses Michelle. No one says a word.
So he reaches over and fondles her. Still, nobody says a word.
So he stands up, grabs her, rips her clothes off, throws her on the
table, and makes love to her there, on the table, in front of her parents.

His girlfriend is a little flustered, her dad is obviously livid,and
her mom horrified when he sits back down, but no-one says a word. He
looks at her mom. "She's got a great body," he thinks. So he grabs the
mom and, to cut a long story short, has his way with her every
which way, also right there on the dinner table. Now his girlfriend is
furious and her dad is boiling, but still, total silence

All of a sudden there is a loud clap of thunder, and it starts to rain.
Mick remembers his bike, so he pulls the jar of Vaseline from his

Suddenly the father backs away from the table and shouts, "All right,
that's enough, I'll do the damn dishes!"


My VB Garage

"God loves Marines, because we kill everything we see." - R. Lee Ermey, Full Metal Jacket
Devil Dog is offline  
Sponsored Links
post #2 of 8 (permalink) Old 09-15-2006, 09:24 AM
blackrose613's Avatar
Join Date: May 2006
Location: Morton Grove, IL
Posts: 682
Location: Morton Grove, IL
Sportbike: Katana 750
Years Riding: 30 years
How you found us: google search
Send a message via Yahoo to blackrose613

2000 Suzuki Katana 750

Originally Posted by Odysseys View Post
Lol I am no pimp. I am married and have no game.
blackrose613 is offline  
post #3 of 8 (permalink) Old 09-15-2006, 09:43 AM
Curb your dogma.
Phily-D's Avatar
Join Date: Nov 2004
Location: Plainfield
Posts: 2,410
Location: Plainfield
Sportbike: another Honda:)
Years Riding: little while now....
How you found us: BusaDave

Phily-D is offline  
post #4 of 8 (permalink) Old 09-15-2006, 09:45 AM
HDTony's Avatar
Join Date: Apr 2002
Location: Plainfield IL
Posts: 45,956
Location: Plainfield IL
Sportbike: A couple of pasta rockets
Years Riding: Since 1989
How you found us: In the beginning there was CLSB and Tony saw that it was good.
Send a message via AIM to HDTony

HDTony.... Damn glad to meet you!

Government's view of the economy could be summed up in a few short phrases: If it moves, tax it. If it keeps moving, regulate it. And if it stops moving, subsidize it.

- Ronald Reagan

AirTek Heating & Air inc.
HDTony is offline  
post #5 of 8 (permalink) Old 09-15-2006, 10:40 AM
Slow Old Guy.
Wink's Avatar
Join Date: Sep 2005
Location: SS Barrington
Posts: 17,258
Location: SS Barrington
Sportbike: Inline Two Wheeled
Years Riding: Since the beginning of time
How you found us: Dan Ortega sent me
Cute one!

Great Quote - One would think that the Secret Service was smart enough to get serviced secretly.

MotoVid hasbeen
NESBA hasbeen

CCS neverbeen
WERA neverbeen
Wink is offline  
post #6 of 8 (permalink) Old 09-15-2006, 11:25 AM
Hunny's Avatar
Join Date: Jun 2004
Location: Barrington
Posts: 7,012
Location: Barrington
Sportbike: 06 Gsx-R 600
Years Riding: 4 years
How you found us: Your Mom!
Send a message via AIM to Hunny Send a message via Yahoo to Hunny

Bikes can be replaced...people can't...ride safe!!
Sex is like math... you add the bed, subtract the clothes, divide the legs and pray you don't multiply!
<---- Kristin
Hunny is offline  
post #7 of 8 (permalink) Old 09-15-2006, 12:04 PM
King Nothing

Kegger's Avatar
Join Date: Nov 2004
Location: Ur Moms House
Posts: 17,944
Location: Ur Moms House
Sportbike: I ride Ur Mom
Years Riding: As long as Ive known Ur Mom
How you found us: u found me
Most Excellent!

"When in doubt, use full throttle. It may not improve your situation, but it will end the suspense."
Kegger is offline  
post #8 of 8 (permalink) Old 09-15-2006, 12:09 PM
Chills's Avatar
Join Date: Aug 2003
Location: Naperville, IL
Posts: 23,640
Location: Naperville, IL
Sportbike: Kawi ZX-10R
Years Riding: Since February 2012
How you found us: NESBA bbs
Send a message via Yahoo to Chills

Never a bad time to climb... unless the weather is really horrible, and then you climb inside!

I bleed GREEN
Chills is offline  

Quick Reply

Register Now

In order to be able to post messages on the Chicagoland Sportbikes forums, you must first register.
Please enter your desired user name, your email address and other required details in the form below.

User Name:
Please enter a password for your user account. Note that passwords are case-sensitive.


Confirm Password:
Email Address
Please enter a valid email address for yourself.

Email Address:


Thread Tools
Show Printable Version Show Printable Version
Email this Page Email this Page
Display Modes
Linear Mode Linear Mode

Posting Rules  
You may post new threads
You may post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is On
Trackbacks are On
Pingbacks are On
Refbacks are On

For the best viewing experience please update your browser to Google Chrome