Brian the Hen - Chicagoland Sportbikes
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post #1 of 4 (permalink) Old 10-05-2006, 06:39 PM Thread Starter
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Brian the Hen

Brian the Hen

Brian came home from the pub late one Friday evening stinko drunk, as he often did, and crept into bed beside his wife who was already asleep.

He gave a peck on the cheek and fell asleep. When he woke he found a strange man standing at the end of his bed wearing a long flowing white robe. "Who the hell are you?" demanded Brian, "and what are you doing in my bedroom?"

The mysterious man answered: "This isn't your bedroom, and I'm St Peter".

Brian was stunned. "You mean I'm dead?! That can't be, I have so much to live for, I haven't said goodbye to my family . you've got to send me back straight away."

St Peter replied, "Yes you can be reincarnated but there is a catch. We can only send you back as a dog or a hen."

Brian was devastated, but knowing there was a farm not far from his house, he asked to be sent back as a hen. A flash of light later he was covered in feathers and clucking around pecking the ground.

"This ain't so bad," he thought until he felt this strange feeling welling up inside him.

The farmyard rooster strolled over and said, "So you're the new hen; how are you enjoying your first day here?"

"It's not so bad," replies Brian, "but I have this strange feeling inside like I'm about to explode."

"You're ovulating," explained the rooster, "don't tell me you've never laid an egg before."

"Never," replies Brian.

"Well just relax and let it happen."

And so he did, and after a few uncomfortable seconds later, an egg pops out from under his tail. An immense feeling of relief swept over him and his emotions got the better of him, as he experienced motherhood for the first time. When he laid his second egg, the feeling of happiness was overwhelming and he knew that being reincarnated as a hen was the best thing that ever happened to him ... ever!

The joy kept coming and as he was just about to lay his third egg he felt an enormous smack on the back of his head and heard his wife shouting, "Brian, wake up you drunken bastard, you're shitting the bed!

Craig

My VB Garage

"God loves Marines, because we kill everything we see." - R. Lee Ermey, Full Metal Jacket
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post #2 of 4 (permalink) Old 10-05-2006, 06:41 PM
 
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post #3 of 4 (permalink) Old 10-05-2006, 07:01 PM
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post #4 of 4 (permalink) Old 10-05-2006, 09:01 PM
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