Jokes!!! - Chicagoland Sportbikes
Chicagoland Sportbikes
 
The Funny Papers got some funny stuff? Make us laugh.

 
LinkBack Thread Tools Display Modes
post #1 of 5 (permalink) Old 08-04-2003, 04:22 PM Thread Starter
Ryde or Die
 
Night Stalker's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jul 2003
Location: Dupage
Posts: 200
Location: Dupage
Sportbike: 01 R1 Yamaha
Years Riding: 10 Dirt/8 Pavement
 
Jokes!!!

Q. How can you tell when an auto mechanic just had sex?
A. One of his fingers is clean.

Q. Why does a penis have a hole in the end?
A. So men can be open minded.

Q. What's the biggest fish in the world?
A. A hore, if you catch one you can eat her for months.

Q. How can you tell if your girlfriend wants you?
A. When you put your hand down her pants and it feels like you're feeding a horse.

Q. Have you heard about the new 'Mint flavored birth control pill for women that they take immediately before sex?
A. They're called 'Predickamints'

Q. What is the difference between a golf ball and a g-spot?
A. Men will spend two hours searching for a golf ball.

Q. What's the difference between a toad and a horny toad?
A. One goes "ribbit" the other goes "rub it".'

Q. Did you hear about the guy who finally figured out women?
A. He died laughing before he could tell anybody.

Q. What's the difference between Mad Cow disease and PMS?
A. Nothing.

Q. How do you confuse a female archaeologist?
A. Give her a used tampon and ask her what period it's from.


Q. Why does the bride always wear white?
A. Well aren't all kitchen appliances that colour?

Q. What's the difference between parsley and pussy?
A. Nobody eats parsley.

Q. What's green, slimy and smells like Miss Piggy?
A. Kermit's Finger

Q. What do you do with 365 used rubbers?
A. Melt them down, make a tire, and call it a Goodyear.

Q. What's the difference between sin and shame?
A. It is a sin to put it in, but it's a shame to pull it out.

Q. What's the speed limit of sex?
A. 68 because at 69 you have to turn around.

Q. What's the ultimate rejection?
A. When you're masturbating and your hand falls asleep.

Q. Why did Raggedy Anne get thrown out of the toy box?
A. Because she kept sitting on Pinocchio's face moaning, "Lie to me!"

Q. Why is air a lot like sex?
A. Because it's no big deal unless you're not getting any.

Q. What did the egg say to the boiling water?
A. "How can you expect me to get hard so fast? I just got laid a minute ago."



Many men, wish death upon me
Blood in my eye dawg and I can't see
I'm trying to be what I'm destined to be.
Night Stalker is offline  
Sponsored Links
Advertisement
 
post #2 of 5 (permalink) Old 08-04-2003, 04:34 PM
Old Squid on a Blade
 
Blade Runner's Avatar
 
Join Date: Apr 2002
Location: Carpentersville
Posts: 9,389
Location: Carpentersville
Sportbike: 2000 929
Years Riding: Longer than most of you have been alive. And I'm still slow.
How you found us: The voices in my head told me to come here
           
Groan, some of those hurt...

There is nothing firm, nothing balanced, nothing durable in all the universe. Nothing remains in its original state, each day, each hour, each moment, there is change. Change is the essence of life. Embrace change as you do life. To fight change is to live in the past.
Blade Runner is offline  
post #3 of 5 (permalink) Old 08-05-2003, 03:26 AM
well i got my knee down BUT, i need a new side panel
 
taziscool's Avatar
 
Join Date: Apr 2002
Location: Muskego, WI
Posts: 1,877
Location: Muskego, WI
Sportbike: Several old, mint condition crusiers.....
Years Riding: 22
How you found us: Original member......
 
Maybe it's just wrong........but I loved this one!

Q. Why does the bride always wear white?
A. Well aren't all kitchen appliances that colour?


taziscool is offline  
post #4 of 5 (permalink) Old 08-05-2003, 09:59 AM
Registered User
 
MeggysGixxer's Avatar
 
Join Date: Apr 2002
Location: NW Burbs
Posts: 1,084
Location: NW Burbs
Sportbike: 2001 Gixxer 600
Years Riding: Long Enough to know better
 
I like Raggedy Anne and Pinocchio.........
MeggysGixxer is offline  
post #5 of 5 (permalink) Old 08-05-2003, 10:40 AM
Registered User
 
BABETTE's Avatar
 
Join Date: Apr 2002
Location: Franklin Park, IL
Posts: 1,094
Location: Franklin Park, IL
Sportbike: 98' CBR600F3
Years Riding: 10 yrs
How you found us: back in the old days of SBN
           
BABETTE is offline  
Reply

Quick Reply
Message:
Options

Register Now



In order to be able to post messages on the Chicagoland Sportbikes forums, you must first register.
Please enter your desired user name, your email address and other required details in the form below.

User Name:
Password
Please enter a password for your user account. Note that passwords are case-sensitive.

Password:


Confirm Password:
Email Address
Please enter a valid email address for yourself.

Email Address:
OR

Log-in










Thread Tools
Show Printable Version Show Printable Version
Email this Page Email this Page
Display Modes
Linear Mode Linear Mode



Posting Rules  
You may post new threads
You may post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is On
Trackbacks are On
Pingbacks are On
Refbacks are On

 
For the best viewing experience please update your browser to Google Chrome