Vaseline and the Motorcycle - Chicagoland Sportbikes
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post #1 of 10 (permalink) Old 01-31-2010, 06:56 PM Thread Starter
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Vaseline and the Motorcycle

Joe wanted to buy a motorcycle. He doesn't have much luck until one
day, he comes across a Harley with a 'for sale' sign on it.
The bike seems even better than a new one, although it is 10 years
Old. It is shiny and in absolute mint condition.

He immediately buys it, and asks the seller how he kept it in such
great condition for 10 years.

'Well, it's quite simple, really,' says the seller, 'whenever the Bike
is outside and it's gonna rain, rub Vaseline on the chrome. It Protects
it from the rain.'

And he hands Joe a jar of Vaseline.

That night, his girlfriend, Sandra, invites him over to meet her
Parents. Naturally, they take the bike there.

But just before they enter the house, Sandra stops him and says, 'I
have to tell you something about my family before we go in.' 'When we
eat dinner, we don't talk. In fact, the first person who Says anything
during dinner has to do the dishes.'

'No problem,' he says. And in they go.

Joe is shocked. Right smack in the middle of the living room is a Huge
stack of dirty dishes.

In the kitchen is another huge stack of dishes. Piled up on the Stairs,
in the corridor, everywhere he looks, dirty dishes.

They sit down to dinner and, sure enough, no one says a word.

As dinner progresses, Joe decides to take advantage of the Situation..


So he leans over and kisses Sandra.

No one says a word.

So he reaches over and fondles her breasts.

Still, nobody says a word.

So he stands up, grabs her, rips her clothes off, throws her on the
table, and screws her right there, in front of her parents.
His girlfriend is a little flustered, her dad is obviously livid, and
Her mom horrified when he sits back down, but no one says a word.

He looks at her mom..

'She's got a great body,' he thinks. So he grabs the mom, bends her
Over the dinner table, and has his way with her every which way Right
there on the dinner table.

Now his girlfriend is furious and her dad is boiling, but still, Total
silence.

All of a sudden there is a loud clap of thunder, and it starts to Rain.

Joe remembers his bike, so he pulls the jar of Vaseline from his
Pocket...


Suddenly the father shouted....'I'll do the f****** dishes!!!


Jon
MSF Instructor


<---- Useless

Always Stand For What You Believe In... Even If Means You Stand Alone...
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post #2 of 10 (permalink) Old 01-31-2010, 07:01 PM
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Cute one, haven't heard that one in years. thanks Jon.

===========
Great Quote - One would think that the Secret Service was smart enough to get serviced secretly.

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post #3 of 10 (permalink) Old 01-31-2010, 07:06 PM
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post #4 of 10 (permalink) Old 01-31-2010, 07:09 PM
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Homophobes.

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post #5 of 10 (permalink) Old 01-31-2010, 07:32 PM
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post #6 of 10 (permalink) Old 01-31-2010, 07:33 PM
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It's ok if you liked it.
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post #7 of 10 (permalink) Old 02-01-2010, 08:11 AM
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That was a good laugh to start the day with.

You wanna see my itinerary?
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post #8 of 10 (permalink) Old 02-01-2010, 08:21 AM
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Nice.

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post #9 of 10 (permalink) Old 02-01-2010, 08:30 AM
^^^Bad for your hearing
 
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Nice one! I had to go back and read the last 2 lines for a laugh. (im a little slow off the line sometimes lol)

Everyone needs a healthy way to relax, mine Church, and two wheels, a stretch of winding road, and a pipe loud enough to give me headaches and make squirrels explode. (Fixed curtousey of PWRMAD)

Nothing is impossible the second we say ill try your already admiting you can be defeated, and the second you say i cant or its to hard youve already failed.
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post #10 of 10 (permalink) Old 02-01-2010, 09:41 AM
Boo boo kitty fuck
 
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Quote:
Originally Posted by catwlights View Post
Im bringing my gym shoes so I can surf the roof.....



ooooooo. I need a cape.
Sometimes you're the bug...sometimes you're the windshield
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