Cool things about being a man. - Chicagoland Sportbikes
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post #1 of 2 (permalink) Old 12-04-2002, 04:29 PM Thread Starter
HDTony's Avatar
Join Date: Apr 2002
Location: Plainfield IL
Posts: 45,955
Location: Plainfield IL
Sportbike: A couple of pasta rockets
Years Riding: Since 1989
How you found us: In the beginning there was CLSB and Tony saw that it was good.
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Cool things about being a man.

Cool things about being a man:


> 1. Your ass is never a factor in a job interview.

> 2. Your orgasms are real. Always.

> 3. Your last name stays put.

> 4. The garage is all yours.

> 5. Wedding plans take care of themselves.

> 6. You never feel compelled to stop a friend from getting laid.

> 7. Car mechanics tell you the truth.

> 8. You don't give a rat's ass if someone notices your new haircut.

> 9. Hot wax never comes near your pubic area.

> 10. Same work .. more pay.

> 11. Wrinkles add character.

> 12. You don't have to leave the room to make emergency crotch


> 13. Wedding Dress $2000; Tux rental $100.

> 14. If you retain water, it's in a canteen.

> 15. People never glance at your chest when you're talking to them.

> 16. New shoes don't cut, blister, or mangle your feet.

> 17. One mood, ALL the damn time.

> 18. Phone conversations are over in 30 seconds.

> 19. A five-day vacation requires only 1 suitcase.

> 20. You can open all your own jars.

> 21. You get extra credit for the slightest act of thoughtfulness.

> 22. Your underwear is $10 for a three-pack.

> 23. If you are 34 and single, nobody notices.

> 24. You can quietly enjoy a car ride from the passenger's seat.

> 25. Three pairs of shoes are more than enough.

> 26. You can quietly watch a game with your buddy for hours without


> thinking "He must be mad at me."

> 27. No maxi-pads.

> 28. If another guy shows up at the party in the same outfit, you just


> become lifelong friends.

> 29. You are not expected to know the names of more than five colors.

> 30. You don't have to stop and think of which way to turn a nut on a


> 31. You are unable to see wrinkles in clothes.

> 32. The same hairstyle lasts for years, maybe decades.

> 33. Your belly usually hides your big hips.

> 34. One wallet and one pair of shoes, one color, all seasons.

> 35. You can "do" your nails with a pocketknife.

> 36. Christmas shopping can be accomplished for 25 relatives, on


> 24th, in minutes.

> 37. The world is your urinal.

> ===============================================

> Ten things men know for sure about women:

> 1.

> 2.

> 3.

> 4.

> 5.

> 6.

> 7.

> 8.

> 9.

> 10. They have breasts.

HDTony.... Damn glad to meet you!

Government's view of the economy could be summed up in a few short phrases: If it moves, tax it. If it keeps moving, regulate it. And if it stops moving, subsidize it.

- Ronald Reagan

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post #2 of 2 (permalink) Old 12-04-2002, 05:19 PM
Join Date: Oct 2002
Posts: 899
Re: Cool things about being a man.

Originally posted by GsxrTony
Cool things about being a man:
BRAVO, Tony... that is simply amazing!
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