The Man Code - Chicagoland Sportbikes
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post #1 of 2 (permalink) Old 12-04-2002, 06:03 PM Thread Starter
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unclepetey's Avatar
 
Join Date: Apr 2002
Location: Bolingbrook
Posts: 193
Location: Bolingbrook
Sportbike: GSXR 1000
Years Riding: 5
How you found us: sbn
           
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The Man Code

The Man Code

1) The universal compensation for buddies who help
you move is beer.
2) Never hesitate to reach for the last beer or the
last slice of pizza,
but not both. That's just plain mean.
3) Bitching about the brand of free beer in a
buddy's refrigerator is
forbidden. You may gripe if the temperature is
unsuitable.
4) Any man who brings a camera to a bachelor party
may be legally killed
and eaten by his fellow party goers.
5) Women who claim they "love to watch sports" must
be treated as spies
until they demonstrate knowledge of the game and the
ability to pick a
buffalo wing clean.
6) If a buddy is outnumbered, out manned, or too
drunk to fight, you must
jump in and fight. (Exception): If during the events
of a day, his actions
have caused you to think, "What this guy needs is a
good ass-whoopin", then
you may sit back and enjoy.
7) Unless he murdered someone in your immediate
family, you must bail a
friend out of jail within 12 hours.
8) The minimum amount of time you have to wait for
another guy who's
running late is 5 minutes. For a woman, you are
required to wait 10 minutes
for every point of hotness she scores on the classic
1-10 scale.
9) No man is ever required to buy a birthday present
for another man. In
fact, even remembering a friend's birthday is strictly
optional and slightly
purple guy.
10) Agreeing to distract the ugly friend of a hot
babe your buddy is
trying to hook up with is your legal duty. Should you
get carried away in
the act of distraction, and end up sleeping with her,
your pal is forbidden
to speak of it, even at your bachelor party.
11) If a man's zipper is down, that's his problem
--- you didn't see
nothin'.
12) When stumbling upon other guys watching a sports
event, you may always
ask the score of the game in progress, but you may
never ask who's playing.
13) It is permissible to consume a fruity chick
drink only when you're
sunning on a tropical beach... and it's delivered by a
topless super
model...and it's free.
14) Unless you're in prison, never fight naked.
15) A man in the company of a hot, suggestively
dressed woman must remain
sober enough to fight.
16) If you compliment a guy on his six-pack, you
better be referring to
his beer.
17) Never join your girlfriend/wife in dissing a
buddy, except when she's
withholding sex pending your response.
18) Never talk to a man in the bathroom unless
you're on equal footing:
either both urinating or both waiting in line. In all
other situations, a
nod is all the conversation you need.
19) "Thou shall not rent the movie "Chocolat"
20) Under no circumstances may two men share an
umbrella.

Pete
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post #2 of 2 (permalink) Old 12-05-2002, 11:54 AM
Old Squid on a Blade
 
Blade Runner's Avatar
 
Join Date: Apr 2002
Location: Carpentersville
Posts: 9,389
Location: Carpentersville
Sportbike: 2000 929
Years Riding: Longer than most of you have been alive. And I'm still slow.
How you found us: The voices in my head told me to come here
           
Sound about right, but what the f is the movie "Chocolat"? Or don't I want to know....

There is nothing firm, nothing balanced, nothing durable in all the universe. Nothing remains in its original state, each day, each hour, each moment, there is change. Change is the essence of life. Embrace change as you do life. To fight change is to live in the past.
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