Misc. - Chicagoland Sportbikes
Chicagoland Sportbikes
 
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post #1 of 1 (permalink) Old 12-15-2002, 10:07 PM Thread Starter
Evil Moderatrix
 
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Join Date: Apr 2002
Location: Think corn and pigs. Lots and lots of corn and pigs.
Posts: 8,030
Location: Think corn and pigs. Lots and lots of corn and pigs.
Sportbike: A Big Blue One, a threesome of Sexy Red Ones - and a Happy Yellow One!
Years Riding: Quarter century.
How you found us: I was looking for Jimmy Choo's in my shoe closet.
           
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Misc.

A small boy was lost, so he went up to a policeman and said, "I've lost my dad!"
The cop asked, "What's he like?"
The little boy replied, "Beer and women!"

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A flight attendant was stationed at the departure gate to check tickets. As a man approached, she extended her hand for the ticket and he opened his trench coat and flashed her. Without missing a beat, she said, "Sir, I asked to see your ticket, not your stub."

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Q. How do you stop a Taliban tank?
A. Shoot the guys pushing it.

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Two men in a pickup truck drove into a lumberyard. One of the men walked in the office and said, "We need some four-by-twos.
"The clerk said, "You mean two-by-fours, don't you?"
The man said, "I'll go check," and went back to the truck.
He returned in a minute and said, "Yeah, I meant two-by-fours."
"Alright. How long do you need them?"
The customer paused for a minute and said, "I'd better go check."
After a while, the customer returned and said, "A long time. We're gonna build a house."
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An executive was interviewing a young blonde for a position in his company. He wanted to find out something about her personality so he asked, "If you could have a conversation with someone-living or dead-who would it be?"

The blonde quickly responded, "The living one."

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One morning a man came into the church on crutches. He stopped in front of the holy water, put some on both legs, and then threw away his crutches. An altar boy witnessed the scene and ran into the rectory to tell the priest what he'd just seen. "

Son, you've just witnessed a miracle," the priest said. "Tell me where is this man now?"

"Flat on his ass over by the holy water," the boy informed him.

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A cowboy walks into a bar and orders a whisky. When the bartender delivers the drink, the cowboy asks, "Where is everybody?"

The bartender replies, " They've gone to the hanging."

"Hanging? Who are they hanging?"

"Brown Paper Pete," the bartender replied.

"What kind of a name is that?" the cowboy asked.

"Well," says the bartender, "he wears a brown paper hat, brown paper shirt, brown paper trousers and brown paper shoes."

"How bizarre," said the cowboy. "What are they hanging him for?"

"Rustling," answered the bartender.

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The problem with getting old is that you are not going to outgrow it.

Kim
CCS AM #815 - the cute, fuzzy, yellow, spoiled-rotten half of Team Duc Tape!
I break stuff
Duck, duck, duck, GUZ!
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