One day a guy dies and finds himself in hell. As he is
despair, he has his first meeting with the devil...
Satan: Why so glum?
Guy: Why do you think? I'm in hell!
Satan: Hell's not so bad. We actually have a lot of
fun down here. You a
Guy: Sure, I love to drink.
Satan: Well you're gonna love Mondays then. On Mondays
that's all we
do is drink. Whiskey, tequila, Guinness, wine coolers,
and Fresca. We drink till we throw up and then we
drink some more! And
you don't have to worry about getting a hangover,
because you're dead
Guy: Gee, that sounds great!
Satan: You a smoker?
Guy: You better believe it!
Satan: All right! You're gonna love Tuesdays. We get
the finest cigars
from all over the world and smoke our lungs out. If
you get cancer - no
biggie, you're already dead, remember?
Guy: Wow... that's awesome!
Satan: I bet you like to gamble.
Guy: Why yes, as a matter of fact I do.
Satan: Cause Wednesdays you can gamble all you want.
Roulette, Poker, Lots, whatever. If you go
doesn't matter, you're dead anyhow.
Satan: What about Drugs?
Guy: Are you kidding? Love drugs! You don't mean...
Satan: That's right! Thursday is drug day. Help
yourself to a great big
bowl of crack, or smack.
Smoke a doobie the size of a submarine. You can do all
drugs you want. You're dead, who cares.
Guy: WOW! I never realized Hell was such a cool place!
Satan: You gay?
Satan: Ooooh, Fridays are gonna be tough