Only In America!!! - Chicagoland Sportbikes
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post #1 of 11 (permalink) Old 05-25-2003, 09:37 PM Thread Starter
 
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Only In America!!!

Only in america...are there handicap parking in front of a skating rink.
Only in america... do we leave cars worth thousands of dollars in the driveway and put are worthless junks in the garage.
Only in america...do they have drive-up ATM machines with braille
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post #2 of 11 (permalink) Old 05-26-2003, 09:52 AM
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Those are pretty good.

Life is too short to ride anything but an R1

In memory of FastBlueR1...RIP

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post #3 of 11 (permalink) Old 05-26-2003, 10:18 AM
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I just got an email from an Andy Rooney bit about living in America. Very good stuff. I wish I knew how to post an email message...maybe its not possible

Mike

When the tailgate drops..the bullshit stops
Hunt ethically - Hunt with a trained Retriever !
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post #4 of 11 (permalink) Old 05-26-2003, 04:18 PM
 
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Quote:
Originally posted by 2weelpilot
I just got an email from an Andy Rooney bit about living in America. Very good stuff. I wish I knew how to post an email message...maybe its not possible
copy it then paste it.
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post #5 of 11 (permalink) Old 05-26-2003, 04:50 PM
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sorry Doc ....no comprendo that ! Send me your e mail and Ill forward it to you so you can post it

Mike

When the tailgate drops..the bullshit stops
Hunt ethically - Hunt with a trained Retriever !
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post #6 of 11 (permalink) Old 05-26-2003, 05:18 PM
 
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You can email it to me [email protected] I will post it for you if you need help. but you can just highlight the writting then right click copy then right click in this box, then paste.
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post #7 of 11 (permalink) Old 05-26-2003, 05:49 PM
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you have mail

Mike

When the tailgate drops..the bullshit stops
Hunt ethically - Hunt with a trained Retriever !
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post #8 of 11 (permalink) Old 05-26-2003, 06:08 PM
 
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Andy Rooney said on 60 minutes a few weeks back (for those of you that
don't know Andy Rooney, he is an 82 year old US TV commentator):

I like big cars, big boats, big motorcycles, big houses and big
campfires.

I believe the money I make belongs to me and my family, not some
governmental stooge with a bad comb-over who wants to give it away to
crack addicts for squirting out babies.

Guns do not make you a killer. I think killing makes you a killer. You
can kill someone with a baseball bat or a car, but no one is trying to
ban you from driving to the ball game.

I believe they are called the Boy Scouts for a reason, that is why
there are no girls allowed. Girls belong in the Girl Scouts! ARE YOU
LISTENING MARTHA BURKE?

I think that if you feel ! homosexuality is wrong, it is not a phobia, it
is an opinion.

I don't think being a minority makes you a victim of anything except
numbers. The only things I can think of that are truly discriminatory
are things like the United Negro College Fund, Jet Magazine, Black
Entertainment Television, and Miss Black America. Try to have things
like the United Caucasian College Fund, Cloud Magazine, White
Entertainment Television, or Miss White America; and see what happens.
Jesse Jackson will be knocking down your door.

I have the right "NOT" to be tolerant of others because they are
different, weird, or tick me off.

When 70% of the people who get arrested are black, in cities where 70%
of the population is black, that is not racial profiling, it is the Law
of Probability.

I know what sex is, and there are not varying de! grees of it. If I
received sex from one of my subordinates in my office, it wouldn't be a
private matter or my personal business. I would be "FIRED" immediately!

My father and grandfather didn't die in vain so you can leave the
countries you were born in to come over and disrespect ours.

I believe that if you are selling me a milk shake, a pack of
cigarettes, a news paper. or a hotel room, you must do it in English! As
a matter of fact, if you want to be an American citizen, you should have
to speak English!

I think the police should have every right to shoot your sorry self if
you threaten them after they tell you to stop. If you can't understand
the word "freeze" or "stop" in English, see the above lines.

I feel much safer letting a machine with no political affiliation
recount votes when needed. I know what the defini! tion of lying is.

I don't think just because you were not born in this country, you are
qualified for any special loan programs, government sponsored bank loans
or tax breaks, etc., so you can open a hotel, coffee shop, trinket
store, or any other business.

We did not go to the aid of certain foreign countries and risk our
lives in wars to defend their freedoms, so that decades later they could
come over here and tell us our constitution is a living document; and
open to their interpretations.

I don't hate the rich. I don't pity the poor. I know pro-wrestling is
fake, but so are movies and television.. That doesn't stop you from
watching them.

I believe a self-righteous liberal or conservative with a cause is more
dangerous than a Hell's Angel with an attitude.

I think Bill Gates has every right to kee! p every penny he has made, and
continues to make more. If it ticks you off, go and invent the next
operating system that's better, and put your name on the building.

It doesn't take a whole village to raise a child right, but it does
take a parent to stand up to the kid; and smack their little behinds
when necessary, and say "NO!"

"I think tattoos and piercing are fine if you want them, but please
don't pretend they are a political statement. And, please, stay home
until that new lip ring heals. I don't want to look at your ugly
infected mouth as you serve me french fries!

I am sick of "Political Correctness." I know a lot of black people, and
not a single one of them was born in Africa; s! o how can they be "African
Americans"? Besides,
Africa is a continent.

I don't go around saying I am a European American because my great,
great, great, great, great, great grandfather was from
Europe. I am
proud to be from
America and nowhere else.

And if you don't like my point of view, tough. DON'T PASS IT ON!!
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post #9 of 11 (permalink) Old 05-26-2003, 07:19 PM
 
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Yup, that Andy Rooney, still one of my favorites!!
Anybody have the political platform that Robin Williams laid out if he were to ever run for president? Had it at work a while ago. Another good one to post here!
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post #10 of 11 (permalink) Old 05-27-2003, 01:01 PM
 
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I've read that one before. Once again, always a good article to re-read.
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post #11 of 11 (permalink) Old 05-27-2003, 01:18 PM
Please attend carefully..
 
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Actually, George Carlin had a good one too.....

"Stupidity is also a gift of God, but one mustn't misuse it." - JP2

"Life is just a place where we spend time between games" - former Philadelphia Flyers coach Fred Shero

"everyone's a nutjob, some just have more restraint than others" - EndlessRR
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