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Discussion Starter · #1 ·
A father asks his 10-year-old son if he knows about the birds and the
bees.

"I don't want to know!" the child says, bursting into tears.

"Promise me you won't tell me!"

Confused, the father asks what's wrong.

"Oh, dad," the boy sobs.

"When I was six, I got the 'There's no Santa speech.'

"At seven, I got the 'There's no Easter Bunny' speech.

"When I was eight, you hit me with the 'There's no tooth fairy' speech.

"If you're going to tell me that grown ups don't really get laid, I'll
have
nothing left to live for."
:rofl :rofl :laughing
 

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Evil Moderatrix,
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:rofl
;)
 

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Tgf Og
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9,851 Posts
DRINKING PERSONALITIES
Before you order a drink in public, you should read this!

Seven Colorado bartenders were asked if they could nail a woman's personality based on what she drinks.
Though interviewed separately, they concurred on almost all counts. The results:

Beer Personality: Causal, low-maintenance; down to earth.
Your Approach: Challenge her to a game of pool. - have a good time!

Blender Drinks Personality: Flaky, whiny, annoying; a pain in the ass.
Your Approach: Avoid her, unless you want to be her cabana boy.

Mixed Drinks Personality: Older, more refined, high maintenance, has very picky taste; knows EXACTLY what she wants.
Your Approach: You won't have to approach her. If she's interested, she'll send YOU a drink.

Wine (does not include White Zinfandel)Personality: Conservative and classy; sophisticated yet giggles.
Your Approach: Tell her you love to travel and spend quiet evenings with friends.

White Zinfandel Personality: Easy; thinks she is classy and sophisticated, actually she has NO clue.
Your Approach: Make her feel smarter than she is... this should be an easy target.

Shots Personality: Likes to hang with frat-boy pals and looking to get totally drunk... and naked.
Your Approach: Easiest hit in the joint. You have been blessed. Nothing to do but wait, however, be careful not to make her mad!

Tequila- No explanations required - everyone just KNOWS what happens there.

THEN, there is the MALE addendum ----
The deal with guys is, as always, very simple and clear cut:

Domestic Beer: He's poor and wants to get laid.

Imported Beer: He likes good beer and wants to get laid.

Wine: He's hoping that the wine will give him a sophisticated image to help him get laid.

Mixed drinks: - getting drunk and getting laid

Whiskey: He doesn't give a damn about anything but getting laid.

Tequila: He is thinking he has a chance with the toothless waitress and getting laid

White Zinfandel: He's gay!
 

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CLSB SuperHero
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:rofl Nice. I needed both of those today. Its been a typical Monday.:mad
 

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Evil Moderatrix,
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So who's up for cocktails???
 

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Discussion Starter · #6 ·
KBOlsen said:
So who's up for cocktails???
A beer for me Kim!!!!!!!:cheers :cheers :cheers :D
 

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Who's faster Lupi
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"If you're going to tell me that grown ups don't really get laid, I'll
have nothing left to live for."



So Crazy, howd you make it so far in life after that conversation with your dad.:twofinger
 

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Discussion Starter · #8 ·
Champ91 said:
"If you're going to tell me that grown ups don't really get laid, I'll
have nothing left to live for."



So Crazy, howd you make it so far in life after that conversation with your dad.:twofinger

The girl next door showed me it wasn't true:D :D :cheers
 

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Who's faster Lupi
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Crazy said:
The girl next door showed me it wasn't true:D :D :cheers
:rofl good come back. Need a speechless icon.
 

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Champ91 said:
"If you're going to tell me that grown ups don't really get laid, I'll
have nothing left to live for."



So Crazy, howd you make it so far in life after that conversation with your dad.:twofinger
The girl next door showed me it wasn't true
OWNED!:laughing :laughing
 

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Discussion Starter · #11 ·
Champ91 said:


:rofl good come back. Need a speechless icon.

aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaahhhh the girl next door. Speechless wasn't the word back then:D Still run into her once in a while.:-
 
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